Life is hard.

I am at a place in my life that makes me feel stressed. Perhaps stressed isn't even strong enough of a word to use for how I truly feel right now. School, financial troubles, work, and family contribute to this stress. Not to say that my family is a causation of stress (though, sometimes it can be) the fact that my wife and daughter rely on me to be a loving father, good husband, and excellent role model is sometimes difficult to live up to.

College is a year and a half from being a thing of the past, yet it seems so far away. I can't express how excited I am to become an Art Teacher. Not only will I not have to work some mundane part-time job to afford to go to school, but I'll actually be getting paid for going! I'll have summers to take Anya to so many places (zoos! parks! museums!) and have family vacations, too!

It's weird to think that a time like that will ever arrive. Won't I screw something up before that, just like I've always done? Will I ever really graduate from college? I want to, more than anything, but it's so hard.

There seems to be a constant stream of questions, answers, ponderings, tidbits, etc floating around in my head. Just a few minutes ago I felt everything in my brain just go to mush. Have you ever gone completely blank like that? Nothing in there....just staring at the computer screen waiting for nothing to happen. That's why I eventually came here. Something had to give, I had to get my brain in a better place!

It's time to write again. I know it will help.